Twitter Guidelines

A few weeks ago, a friend asked me how to use Twitter, so I sent him some thoughts and a basic philosophy I have developed over the past 10 years that guides how I utilize it as a tool and seek to avoid some of the dangers and negative ways the platform can act back upon us.

Widely used new technologies provide obvious benefits, but they also change and shape us. Many people fear these changes, and seeing negative effects, swear off the new technology altogether. Over time, I’ve been convinced it’s more important to think carefully about the technology, the habits of use we form, and how to use the technology wisely. If you haven’t read Andy Crouch’s The Tech-Wise Family, I strongly recommend it. You can read my review of it here.

In the spirit of wisdom and along the lines of Crouch’s book, it’s important to ask how we should and shouldn’t use social media like Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram. For now, I’d like to focus on Twitter, which I’ve used for 7 years out of its 12-year existence. Some of my advice can transfer to other platforms and some is unique to the features of Twitter.

Like with all social media and new technology generally, it’s important to think carefully about our purposes for using Twitter, the practices fitting to those aims, and the rules that should govern our use. Here’s my approach.

My Purposes

Before becoming a user and creating a Twitter handle, I spent time learning about how it works by watching others. Eventually, I decided that out of the many reasons a person might use Twitter, I would stick to these five.

First, I use Twitter to be exposed to people (academics, pastors, thinkers, leaders, etc.), information (local and national news, events, etc.), and content (articles, ideas, books, etc.) that I find helpful or that I probably wouldn’t easily come across otherwise. Because users share content and link to other users, Twitter makes it possible to see people and content I wouldn’t know to look for.

Second, I use Twitter to capture live responses to mass events like conferences, presidential debates, or unfolding situations (like a mass shooting or sporting event). Hash tags and trends make it possible to get crowd reactions, insights, and perspectives really quickly.

Third, I use Twitter to interact and dialogue with people I don’t have a chance to talk to in person. This is perhaps one of the top reasons I use Twitter, though this is also one of the more challenging or dangerous ways to engage. Because of how Twitter works, anyone can comment on any tweet and talk back to or tag any other user. This gives unknowns a lot of access to famous, credentialed, or accomplished individuals. As a pastor, I’ve benefitted a lot from interactions with scholars, pastors, and leaders who were gracious enough to respond to my questions, challenges, or rejoinders.

Fourth, I use Twitter to persuade and inform others. I do this in a number of ways. Most of my original tweets (that is, my tweets that are not responding to the tweets of others) aim to direct people to helpful resources, articles, and ideas that I hope will alter what other people believe and think. I often tweet quotes from books I’m reading, or I’ll tweet thoughts I have as a result of my reading.

Fifth, I use Twitter to laugh and be amazed. Because Twitter is filled with people, it’s filled with humor and wonder. I follow some people just because they’re funny and other accounts that somehow demonstrate the awesomeness of our world.

My Practices

With these purposes in mind, here are a few practices I have developed.


Every Twitter user must start with the matter of who to follow. I generally only follow people I know personally, people I’ve engaged in conversation on Twitter that appear helpful, people who have a proven record of helpful content and interaction, and experts in the fields that interest me or are important to my work.

I also limit the number of people I follow to a manageable level. I regularly review and trim down who I am following because my timeline can become overwhelming with too many people. I seriously don’t understand how a person can follow more than several hundred users. I suspect those who follow more than that are doing so only to try to gain followers back and probably curate whom actually shows up in their timeline. Many Twitter users evidently use Twitter to become famous, and so they adopt many practices aimed at growing a larger following. It’s one thing to have a large following because of the content you are producing. It’s another to use Twitter to have a following. The difference is evident in the practices users adopt. More on this below.


Because Twitter allows for rapid interaction with people who are often strangers, the platform regularly devolves into insults, sarcasm, proud self-congratulation, tribal protectionism, and other forms of unloving communication. The platform provides little accountability and often rewards those who exacerbate controversy and cloud issues rather than bringing light to conversations. So I regularly talk to a friend of mine who is also on Twitter to see what he thinks about how I’m interacting with others. In other words, I have a Twitter accountability partner to help me see when I’m not interacting well with others.


Because Twitter is a public platform that anyone can access (and here I’m speaking about non-protected accounts), I do not post pictures of my children. My wife and I seek to limit how many digital pictures of our children end up online because we are uncertain how they will feel when they’re adults about their lives being documented for anyone to see.

My Rules

Twitter is an amazing platform, but there are many dangers. Oddly enough, many users publicly lament its problems, threatening to deactivate their account. I suppose that’s because we all see how dysfunctional and unhelpful it can be. It certainly does encourage vices like vanity, anger, envy, and prideful self-promotion. So here are a few rules I have for myself that I aim to keep. I’d encourage you to adopt them as well.

1. Love your neighbor as yourself.

Love must govern how I listen to the tweets of others. I need to listen charitably to try to understand people, assuming the best. Usually, when Twitter isn’t working well it’s because people fail to show grace to one another. Tweets can only be 240 characters, putting a limit on how effectively a person can flush out an idea. So I have to avoid reacting, work hard to press in for understanding, and give people the benefit of the doubt.

Furthermore, instead of sarcasm and dismissal, I try to engage people respectfully. Sometimes love involves putting things in a pointed and sharp way, but the aim must be the good of my neighbor and not victory over them.

2. Follow people and organizations outside of my tribe and with whom I probably disagree.

One of the dangers of social media platforms is ideological siloing. This is especially dangerous for Facebook users, but it’s possible on Twitter as well if you don’t take steps to follow a variety of people.

3. Don’t virtue signal or twitter shame.

I’ve resolved not to tweet to display to the world my own sense of superiority. This includes commenting on issues simply to show everyone which side of an issue I’m on so I will be recognized as belonging to the “good” side. It’s fine to weigh in on and speak to issues I believe are important and just, but if I’m not doing anything to contribute to the issue, I’m most likely just posturing and signaling. This danger seems to grow the more followers a user acquires.

The flip side of virtue signaling is twitter shaming. I refuse to quote tweet others simply to run them through the mud because of some terrible thing they’ve said or done. This rule is a bit tricky because part of dialoguing with people or debating ideas involves showing the problems with their ideas or actions. Sometimes there’s a fine line between twitter shaming and highlighting a problem, but if I do the later, I aim to interact with the idea and not trash someone to elevate myself.

4. Don’t subtweet.

Subtweeting involves tweeting in reference to a particular user or a tweet without direct mention, typically in a dismissive or mocking way. This is another form of virtue signaling because it refuses to bring the person you disagree with into the conversation in order to debate. It’s an obvious way to criticize another to show your own goodness. It’s smug and not helpful.

5. Don’t humblebrag.

A humblebrag is an ostensibly modest or self-deprecating statement with the actual intention of drawing attention to something of which one is proud. If someone compliments me or my work, the humble response is to reply, “thank you.” But to retweet the compliment or to quote tweet it with a “thank you” or any other reply is to broadcast to all my followers what someone else has said. This is blatant self-promotion and the very opposite of humility, even if I say I’m humbled that they would say such a thing.

6. Don’t name drop or use Twitter to have private conversations.

Mentioning other Twitter user in my tweets should only happen to engage the person in conversation or to promote them or link others to them. I won’t use Twitter to show all my followers that I know someone, am excited to see them in person soon, or had a great time with them. Furthermore, if I want to have a conversation exclusively with a few people, then I contact them using the message function, via text, or through some other messaging platform.

7. Don’t buy followers and don’t follow people just to get them to follow me.

Since my purpose in using Twitter does not include gaining a following in order to be influential, I follow people because I value the content they produce or link to. There are many strategies users employ to gain followers, to be important, and to establish a large platform that avoid the difficult work of actually providing value. This celebrity culture actually leads to some of the worst aspects of Twitter, and I’m pretty sure that if I go that route, I’ll lose my soul.

8. Block trolls and spam.

I regularly get followed by a fake or smutty account. Sometimes, I’ll come across a user who starts trolling or repeatedly engaging in bad faith. I block them all.


I really value Twitter for what it can do to connect me with people, to expose me to helpful ideas, to disseminate my ideas, and to provide an opportunity for dialogue and debate. But I have to be careful to regularly review why I use the platform so that I don’t wander into malformative habits. Many of my rules are aimed at helping me avoid self-promotion, self-righteousness, and self-importance because Twitter can very easily play into my pride.

I’m sure some of you have thought about this too, and I’d love to hear how you approach using the platform.


Infertility in the Church

Quite a few couples at the church where I pastor have welcomed newborns into their family over the past few months, and there are more on the way in the coming months. It’s a joyful season as these families and our church community give thanks to God for these children.

But I know that amidst the numerous pregnancies, there are couples mourning because they are struggling to conceive, often after trying for over a year. I know they long to celebrate with their friends, but they also struggle to shake feelings of jealousy, anger, and even bitterness. I remember when my wife and I waited for over a year before she could get pregnant, and it was one of the hardest seasons of my life. Month after month, we experienced hope as my wife analyzed how she was feeling only to experience disappointment once again. And I sense that this struggle is often more difficult for women who can sometimes feel alienated from or betrayed by their own bodies. Perhaps this is part of the curse of Genesis 3:16.

The difficulty of infertility makes thinking carefully about modern treatments especially complicated. Many Christians don’t know that some of the medical capabilities we possess to help couples conceive can entail moral problems with which Christians cannot be comfortable. As a pastor, part of my job is to teach, instruct, and guide people to be faithful in suffering, but sometimes, by the time we hear a couple is struggling with infertility, steps are already being taken that are morally problematic.

I can’t and shouldn’t try to tackle all of these in a blog post, but today I came across a helpful little video on The Gospel Coalition blog of a discussion with bioethicist Dr. Megan Best on infertility (find her book on the subject here). I think it’s a helpful video for those struggling with infertility and all of us seeking to care for and walk with the heartbroken in our midst.

I remember that while my wife and I struggled with infertility, I found hope in God’s promise to barren Israel in Isaiah 54:1-3 and to eunuchs in Isaiah 56:4-5 (ESV):

[54:1] “Sing, O barren one, who did not bear;
break forth into singing and cry aloud,
you who have not been in labor!
For the children of the desolate one will be more
than the children of her who is married,” says the LORD.
[2] “Enlarge the place of your tent,
and let the curtains of your habitations be stretched out;
do not hold back; lengthen your cords
and strengthen your stakes.
[3] For you will spread abroad to the right and to the left,
and your offspring will possess the nations
and will people the desolate cities.

[56:4] For thus says the LORD:
“To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths,
who choose the things that please me
and hold fast my covenant,
[5] I will give in my house and within my walls
a monument and a name
better than sons and daughters;
I will give them an everlasting name
that shall not be cut off.

These verses don’t magically make infertility easy, but they do point us to the faithfulness of God to bring comfort to those who mourn and to bring greater joy to those who persevere in the midst of disappointment.

You can find the blog post on TGC here.